Articles
Healing from Trauma/Neglect/Abuse
Maintaining a Relationship with Your Relative Child’s Parents
When a parent struggles with substance use, it can shake the whole family. Often, grandparents, aunts, or uncles step in to raise the child. This is a loving and brave choice, but it is also painful. You may feel sadness, anger, or guilt as you take on this role. You...
Strengths Before Struggles: A New Way to See Your Child or Youth
When a child has lived through tough times, like trauma, neglect, or abuse, the adults in their life often focus on what’s “wrong” and try to fix it. We invite you to consider that there is another way to tackle the challenges and the impacts they have on your...
Welcoming a Child to Your Home as a Relative Caregiver
When a child in your extended family can’t live with their parents, it often falls to someone like you—a grandparent, aunt, uncle, or cousin—to step in and offer the safety, love, and stability they need. Bringing this child into your home is a powerful act of care....
Impacts of Prenatal Exposure to Alcohol and Drugs
Potty Training Your Relative Child, Part 1
Taking care of children who have experienced loss, chaos, or exposure to alcohol or drugs before birth can be a big job, especially when it comes to potty training. These children may face extra challenges to conquer potty training, but with understanding, patience,...
Life Skills to Build Capable Young Adults
When you're raising a grandchild, niece, nephew, or other young family members, you're not just stepping in — you're standing in the gap. Many of these kids carry heavy stories: trauma, abuse, family separation, prenatal substance exposure and more. You hold dear the...
How to Support a Child with Executive Function Delays
You may hear from your grandchild's teacher or your nephew's pediatrician about their "executive function skills," you might wonder, "What exactly does that mean?" Executive function is the set of neurological processes that helps us organize and supervise our...
Challenging Behaviors
Outdoor Activities with Your Relative Child To Build Crucial Skills
Across the state, Spring is springing up everywhere! Sending the kids outside to play relieves many grandparents and family caregivers. After all, many of us would agree that Winter means too much time inside for our kids, on screens, in their rooms, or getting on...
How to Support a Child with Executive Function Delays
You may hear from your grandchild's teacher or your nephew's pediatrician about their "executive function skills," you might wonder, "What exactly does that mean?" Executive function is the set of neurological processes that helps us organize and supervise our...
Welcoming a New Child to Your Home
When you agree to open your home to a relative child, you are agreeing to so much more than providing a clean, safe bed and regular meals. You are agreeing to offer them an emotionally and physically safe place to heal from the challenges they encountered before...
ADHD
Helping Your Tween or Teen Develop Their Whole Person
Does your tween or teen grandchild (nephew or cousin) act sullen, angry, illogical, and overly emotional? Do they engage in risky behaviors you never dealt with when raising your kids? You may struggle to understand this young person or feel connected to them because...
Encouraging Curiosity in Children
“Why does the plant need water, Grandma?” “How does that plane stay up in the air?” “What do birds think about when they sleep?” Does your grandchild (nephew, niece, or cousin) ask these questions? Do you feel frustrated, overwhelmed, or stumped by the many questions...
Practical Tips to Help an Easily Distracted Child Pay Attention
Many children impacted by early childhood loss or trauma struggle to pay attention. Kids who were exposed to drugs or alcohol during pregnancy struggle with focus and attention as well. Even if your grandchild does not have a diagnosis of attention deficit...
Disrupting Birth Order
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Helping A Child Heal from Sexual Abuse
Helping a Child Cope with the Impacts of Sexual Abuse
When a child is sexually abused or assaulted, one of the most damaging impacts of that traumatic experience is shame. The weight of shame and self-blame can lead to years of negative self-talk, depression, anxiety, self-esteem struggles, and more. These impacts make...
3 Ways to Help a Child Heal from Sexual Abuse
It is painful to consider that your grandchild (niece, cousin, or friend) was sexually abused. You might fear the path ahead and worry if they will ever overcome the pain and stigma of the abuse. The good news is that kids can and do heal from this type of abuse if...
School Issues for Foster & Kinship Kids
When a Student Refuses to Comply with School Supports – Part 2
When a child has learning challenges, they may receive special support and services through an IEP (individualized educational plan) or 505 plan. These accommodations and resources are unique to this child's learning style or struggles. They can be a combination of...
When a Student Refuses to Comply with School Supports – Part 1
When a child struggles in school, they often receive special support and services through an IEP (individualized educational plan) or 505 plan. These accommodations and resources are unique to this child's learning style or struggles. They can be a combination of...
5 Tips for Advocating for Your Grandchild in Special Education Services
When raising a grandchild, cousin, or other loved one, you may need to navigate the special education services at their school. The world of IEPs and 504s, speech therapy, and reading support might make you feel like you need to learn another language. But pressing...
Technology/Internet and Our Kids
13 Common-Sense Rules for Internet Use in Your Home
The internet is a fantastic tool for research, entertainment, and connection. Children are getting phones, laptops, and tablets at younger and younger ages. The ease of access to the internet, literally in our back pockets, can make parts of our lives incredibly easy...
Tips for Safe Technology and Internet Use for Tweens and Teens
Are you raising a grandchild (or nephew or cousin) who spends countless hours scrolling on their phone? Do you know what they’re doing on their tablets, laptops, or cell phones? How do we navigate the issues of internet safety, social media culture, and screen time...
Self-Care for Kinship and Foster Parents
Taking Care of Your Grandchild’s Mental and Emotional Wellbeing
Raising your grandchild, niece, nephew, or other young relative can be a blessing. However, it can also be challenging to navigate. When a child lives apart from their parent—especially due to addiction or substance use—it can create deep emotional stress for everyone...
Tips to Help You Plan Regular Self-Care
Raising your relative’s child is a sacred responsibility and a loving act that gives this child a safe space to land when their parents cannot care for them right now. Whether you're a grandparent, aunt, uncle, cousin, or chosen family, you can make a lasting impact...
Why Self-Care Matters When Raising a Relative’s Child
In many tribal communities, raising children is a shared responsibility. Aunties, uncles, grandparents, cousins, and even close family friends who step in when parents cannot show extraordinary love, commitment, and community in action. You likely are reading this...
Relationship with Child’s Parent
Working with Your Grandchild’s Parents is Good for All of You!
Welcoming a grandchild, nephew, or cousin to your home while their parents seek treatment or get back on their feet can be a rewarding and fulfilling experience. After all, you are giving this child a safe space to land when their parents need time to get back on...
Supporting Your Grandchild’s Parents to Succeed
Helping raise your grandchild, nephew, or other relative gives you a unique opportunity to offer nurture and support to the child's parents. The parents may feel shame or guilt about not being able to parent this child. And it's not unusual for your pre-existing...
Tips for Maintaining Relationships with Parents Who Struggle with Substance Abuse
Many grandparents or aunts are raising their grandchild or nephew because the child’s parents are addicted. It is easy and very tempting to judge the child's parents as bad and irresponsible. While you love them, you may be angry at them for putting you in this...
Working Together For the Good of the Child In Your Care
Taking Care of Your Grandchild’s Mental and Emotional Wellbeing
Raising your grandchild, niece, nephew, or other young relative can be a blessing. However, it can also be challenging to navigate. When a child lives apart from their parent—especially due to addiction or substance use—it can create deep emotional stress for everyone...
Keeping Tweens and Teens Busy During Summer Break
Most kids look forward to summer break. The school year is over, the days are long, and there's more time to relax, be outside, and have fun. But after a while, you will likely hear “I’m so bored” or see signs of their restlessness. Many kids who have experienced...
When Your Relative Child’s Parents Struggle with Addiction, Mental Health, or Intellectual Disabilities
Raising a relative child is likely not something you planned for this stage of your life. Your relatives (adult children, cousins, siblings) struggle to manage parenting independently, and stepping in to support them feels like the right thing for everyone who loves...
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This website was supported with funding from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, Administration for Children and Families’ Children’s Bureau through the Improving Child Welfare Through Investing in Family grant #HHS-2021-ACF-ACYF-CW-1921. The purpose of this grant is to provide an array of kinship preparation services and ongoing kinship supports, and provide shared parenting to build trusting relationships between all out-of-home caregivers and parents of children/youth in foster care to ensure parents and families remain actively involved in normal child-rearing activities.
This website is supported by Grant Number 90CW1149 (HHS-2021-ACF-ACYF-CW-1921) from the Children’s Bureau within the Administration for Children and Families, a division of the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. Neither the Administration for Children and Families nor any of its components operate, control, are responsible for, or necessarily endorse this website (including, without limitation, its content, technical infrastructure, and policies, and any services or tools provided). The opinions, findings, conclusions, and recommendations expressed are those of the author(s) and do not necessarily reflect the views of the Administration for Children and Families and the Children’s Bureau.