Have you heard from a doctor or a teacher that your grandchild (or niece or cousin) has “cognitive delays”? Or maybe you’ve heard that the child has developmental delays or an intellectual disability. Whatever it is called, you know that this child develops and learns more slowly than other kids. Some of these kids will catch up once they are in a stable home, but some will be behind all their life. One of the most important things you can do for these kids is to set them up for success (whatever that looks like) once they become an adult.
7 Tips to Launch a Teen with Cognitive Delays into Adulthood
1. Help your child form healthy habits and routines early in life.
Start teaching this young person as soon as you can about life skills, such as doing laundry, planning and cooking meals, and handling money. If your teen has some challenging behaviors, check out this article: “Preparing Kids with Challenging Behaviors for Adulthood.”
2. Consider vocational training for this teen.
College is not the only track or even the best track for many kids. Most high schools offer programs to teach kids the skills that prepare them for a specific job. There are vocational tracks for jobs in carpentry, the food industry, or the health field, such as a Certified Nurse Assistant. A good vocational program should still include classes that will lead to a high school diploma. It might include an internship or on-the-job training while the student earns their diploma.
As your young person gets ready for graduation, ask the school for help with career assessments, apprenticeships, and mentoring. The school can also offer ideas and resources for community college or apprenticeship and mentoring options after high school.
3. Work with the teen’s educational team.
If this young person has an IEP (Individualized Educational Plan), the IEP team should have a plan for how they are getting this young person ready for life after school. By the time the child is in high school, that plan should include job training and placement. Guidance on volunteering and other activities for the young adult’s free time should be available, too.
If the child has significant struggles, the IEP team can help find a place for the young adult to live. There are many options for living arrangements for young people with cognitive or developmental disabilities. There are group homes with supervision, care facilities, and assisted family living. Another choice is an apartment with or without a roommate. You can find a supported living guidebook here. In some cases, the support in a teenager’s IEP can continue until the age of 22. Ask your child’s school about these options.
4. Consider signing up now for a Medicaid waiver.
Depending on how significant the child’s delay is, it may affect their ability to live independently and support themselves. You may want to get them on the list for a Medicaid waiver. To be eligible for a Medicaid waiver based upon a child’s disability, their disability must be diagnosed before the age of 22. In most states, applying before graduation from high school will get them on a waiting list. Be aware that the waiting list in North Carolina is very long. However, it’s important to start this before graduation if you can.
Once a slot on the list opens, you will be contacted about services to help with the child’s needs. These services can include supported employment and help with housing. Your teen might also qualify for supplemental social security income. These resources can help the child live a more independent lifestyle. Click here to learn more.
5. Plan safeguards for this young adult.
If this young person is living alone, help them get to know their neighbors. Be sure they know where to turn for help in times of need or in an emergency. To protect your teen or young adult child, you may want them to carry an information card. Teach them to use this for medical emergencies or with law enforcement. The card should say something like this:
“I have a medical diagnosis of _________. Because of this disability, I may not understand what is happening to me or understand my legal rights. If you need my cooperation, or if I need help, please call the person listed on the back of this card.”
6. Decide whether or not this young person is ready for independent living.
Depending upon this child’s life experiences, skills, and learning delays, they may need to continue to live with you. If that is the case, you may want to consider financial guardianship of them to protect any income they may have. You might also want to be sure there is a care plan in place for them should something happen to you.
7. Take care of yourself.
You are not alone! Many young adults continue to live with friends or family until they are ready to live alone. Don’t be afraid to ask for help! Arch National Network and Resource Center has a feature to search for respite programs in your area. Find out more here.
Continue to Be There
Whether this teen continues to live as an adult in your home or another living situation, they will need your love and support. Continue to support and advocate for this teen. Every young adult needs a safety net. They need a place and a person to whom they can turn for help when adulthood challenges them.
But you don’t have to do it all yourself. There are community and church programs that mentor and support all types of young adults. Help this teen build a support system of people who will mentor and care about them. Teach them great habits during their time with you. Set up a good support network. Even with cognitive delays they can be a productive, successful, and happy adult.